A couple of blogs ago I revelled in the departure of one very annoying temp and I believe I said “one freak down....” Whilst at the time I was overcome with unprecedented joy at the sudden absence of she who mumbles and mishears I didn’t really mean to rid myself of an entire department of them. It seems I may have jinxed myself.
Moody is leaving.
Mr Moody New Zealander, he who forever hovers by my desk with a question pending, he the all unknowledgeable of Crapbags, the master whiner of everything, the man who is never happy. Yes him. He’s off.
This news was broken rather suddenly and abruptly by Harley who unceremoniously gathered us all around Moody’s desk to tell us what was happening. There is always this fear by the management in my department that as soon as something newsworthy is learnt they have to tell people straight away because they’re worried we might find out on the grape vine. This is all the interesting and juicy news of course, not anything that we might benefit in hearing first hand, like redundancies, a new starter or changes to your job. Seeing as we didn’t have a team meeting any time soon and all of the meeting rooms were occupied then the space by Moody’s computer was deemed the place to disclose this shocker. I was genuinely shocked. He never said anything to me before hand and a lot of people asked me if I had known after the announcement. “Surely he must have said something to you?” Nope. Sniff, sniff...
I of course walked up to him and slapped him across the back of the head straight afterwards – “kept that one quiet didn’t you? Hmmm?!!?” From what he said I don’t think he had much choice in the matter, he’s not leaving of his own accord. He’s a contractor and we don’t “do” contractors any more, we do staff instead. At Moody’s age he’s not interested in going staff so there’s no more contract for him sadly.
“So I’m off in January”
“But you’re on annual leave for 3 weeks in January?!”
“Yep, I’ll be back for a bit after to hand over to CJ and then I’m off”
“CJ? They are going to replace you aren’t they? They’re not going to dump me with her!”
“I’d assume so, I’m not sure.”
“DON’T LEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAVVVVVEEEEEEEE MEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”
“Calm down Nancy, and get up off the floor....stop hugging my leg people are staring.”
Yes, you see not only do I lose the one person who seems to know everything I don’t (which is to be fair quite a substantial amount) but I am left to fend for myself and go to CJ with any questions. Now I don’t know a great deal but she by all accounts knows a lot less. In fact she often comes to me for help. Ironic really when her salary is probably 3 times mine. So in a nutshell I am fucked. As from January things are potentially going to get even busier round here as I take on Moody and CJ’s work load (she doesn’t actually DO anything you know! Silly.) and try to fend for myself. Yes, yes, there is the possibility of a new Moody but that won’t be in January (not at the rate our HR team move to employ anyway) and he’ll be new and shiny and have questions all of his own!
Selfish is what it is. Retiring at his age, tsk. Actually I have no idea how old he is, only that he has a big white beard and heart condition and threatens to retire every other week. So I’m assuming close to retirement. Knowing Moody he’ll be well beyond it, I always got the impression he likes to not be at home for a large part of the day. You know, one overhears phone calls...
Jinxed it I did. I take it all back. I love the freaks, they can all stay! I’ll buy them lunch! Even CJ! Don’t leave me freaks! Please!
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