Wish I wasn’t here

I’m back from my hols, tanned, relaxed and rested and of course back into the shit straight away in this place.

Everything was left in CJ’s less than capable hands and as I predicted she had done jack shit all week and I returned to a pile of work on my desk and an accompanying email basically telling me to do the work for her. Oh and that she would be out of the office all day – how convenient. I voiced my annoyance at this loudly in Harley’s ear shot and he made some kind of feeble excuse for it and shrugged his shoulders as he does. No back bone there, shouldn’t have expected any really. I then forwarded CJ’s email to the people I deal with for the work and explained I would be getting on to these straight away as I was just back from annual leave and had found them on my desk. I’m not getting into trouble for her laziness – no siree.

I’ve offered to take her through how to do the work, it’s very straight forward really, I mean I can do it – a mere pleb administrator so surely the high, mighty, all seeing and know-it-all-ing CJ can handle it? She sent me an invite on Outlook to do this next Monday at 10am. FFS. I was tempted to decline and then just stand up and accept verbally over the top of the desk partition (oh how I love you desk partition) but I didn’t. She looked a little put out when I offered the help, my guess is that she doesn’t want to know as then she has no excuse for not doing the work which is exactly why I offered! I have however realised that I will probably be incredibly hung-over on Monday at 10am as I have a small soiree to attend Sunday that will involve drinking alcoholic beverages. Damn. Bad planning.

As ever the reply to “did I miss anything?” was a resounding ‘no’. Nothing interesting ever happens round here anymore, it’s very disappointing on a daily basis to me. However, Kirstie and I went off to get some lunch today and she had a titbit of gossip for me….

Kirstie was chatting to Bog Monkey the other day, he’s one of Moon Monkey’s middle management people but is never here as he works abroad a lot and sounds like an Irish leprechaun, think I might have mentioned him before. Anyhoo, they were chatting about ‘Freaker’ and his penchant for younger ladies. He currently has a 28 year old girlfriend in Dubai (he is 48) who he thinks is going to dump him because he doesn’t want to get married. He was in a 16 year relationship previously but never married then either.

Bog Monkey tells Kirstie the reason Freaker’s 16 year relationship broke up is because he was having an affair with a 20 year old Russian gymnast (I’m not making this shit up but it does sound ridiculous doesn’t it?) – wifey found out and finished it, as you would. So Bog Monkey and Kirstie are tutting away at Freaker’s ridiculous playboy lifestyle and wondering how he manages to bag these women. This is also a bit of a mystery to me, I mean he’s not particularly attractive or fit, he can be incredibly irritating, he takes the piss a lot but isn’t very good at having some back and his needy tendencies towards Kirstie are just pathetic at times. I don’t even think he’s that rich. I’m baffled. Maybe the 28 year old is a bit of a troll, no one ever mentioned these ladies being attractive.

Anyway, I digress. Then the conversation moves on to being made permanent with the company (it’s a big conversation between the contractors at the moment, all the pro’s and cons and things) and FB’s name comes up. Bog Monkey asks Kirstie a couple of questions about it all and Kirstie says “well as you might have guessed she wasn’t that popular round here” and he says yes he got that impression and every time he had to deal with her she was a rude bitch. He said “she seemed to get paid an awful lot of money for doing nothing” and then added that he had heard about her and the ex boss having an affair from sources outside of the company! Kirstie didn’t press him as to where he heard this but he said it wasn’t someone connected with the company, which goes to show that shit like that travels. Bog Monkey also mentioned she had been making a lot of overseas calls in her last weeks here and wondered if the ex boss was setting something up for her abroad. Wouldn’t put it past him.

Its funny how only once she has gone people realise what a stupid, lazy, retarded, boss banging bitch FB was. Wish the people on high had figured that out 3 years ago and they could have saved everyone else in the department/company 3 years of having to put up with her. Still better late than never.