Hello strangers. How’s tricks? It’s been a long time I know, 3 months to the day coincidentally. It might be that you’ve all given up on me by now and this will never get read but I’ll chance it all the same. I’ve finally reached a point where I find myself bored and genuinely with nothing to do so I thought to myself “what do I do when I am in this situation?....What was it I used to do?....I’m sure there was something”. And there it was – the blog.
Good old trusty blog, a friend for many a month and my saviour in the madness. How I have neglected you – will you ever take me back?
I suppose there is 3 months of gossip and scandal to catch you up on? Where do I start?
Well CJ’s gone (start with a bombshell – get their attention). She’s upped and left and gawn to pastures with less of a commute. We all saw it coming, there were long periods of illness, she was signed off work for 2 weeks, a lot of “working from home” and then I’m back from my holidays to find she’s handed in her notice! “Oh the commute was just too much in the end”. Really? You never mentioned it before! Only took her about a year and a half to finally come to that conclusion. Personally I think there are other reasons she’s not letting on but we’ll never know as from last Thursday she no longer works in the nut house.
I couldn’t make the leaving drinks unfortunately. Actually quite a few people couldn’t make it and no one was around to sign the card and to be honest I don’t think many people were that bothered. Luthor’s goodbye and thank you speech was not very heart felt and genuine and a little cringey and CJ’s ‘thank you guys’ speech was even worse. Really emphasised how uncomfortable she is in social situations and what a weirdo she is. She spent the month of her resignation chasing me about asking what she should do for her leaving drinks. Eventually we just planned it for her and sent her an email.
So no more strapping her handbag to her side wherever she goes, no more excessive use of the “speech mark” sign in meetings, no more driving me nuts on a daily basis. Think I’m going to miss her!
Saffa has also moved on to pastures new, namely the 3rd floor and the legal team. We still see her from time to time and she was about at lunch yesterday. Don’t think we’ll get rid of her that easily.
Loads and loads of new people have started. Only 3 months but a lot happens round here in that time! Ms Rigsby is back from her travels and is still alive amazingly enough. We’ve had 4 temps in her absence and 50% of them were feckin’ useless. We are now back with Ms R, a new boy who rubs his legs a lot in a rather strange fashion and we lost one for a while but she’s back next week after some travelling of her own. We have a new bald man with a very egg shaped head which fascinates me as well although he is very new so don’t know much about him yet.
I got to go to the Cape Town office finally which was all very exciting and travel business class which was possibly the most exciting bit of it all! Champagne? Don’t mind if I do… Gunner managed to wangle us a trip there and the boy certainly done well on that one! I’ll have to describe my 5 days in the Western Cape to you in more detail another time….
What else, what else? Managed to piss the head of finance off inadvertently so now I get evils in the corridor and may possibly never be done a favour by the accounts team again. Oh how we laughed at that one (once we’d stopped going “shit, shit shit!”). Celebrated my 3rd hobbit birthday yesterday with Andre putting on a lovely spread once again. Yep number 3 - it’s 3 years next month. Jesus christ on a bike.
Speaking of bikes I saw a man cycle past me on a penny farthing at lunch time today just outside the office. Random.
Had a Team event at a very nice 5 star hotel which was badly run and made all the admin staff feel like worthless plebs (go team!) but on the upside the nibbles were nice, the free bar lovely and I managed to beat the boys 3 times over at pool and steal a bottle of red wine (Gunner’s idea honest) when the waiter’s back was turned.
Ginger’s about to pop and goes on maternity leave in 2 weeks (if she makes it that far) and the management have failed to get anyone in to cover her maternity leave. I know, they only had 7 months notice so it’s more than we could expect…. Currently boy rubbing trousers is due to step in with no experience whatsoever so basically that means when Ginger goes I will be left to train him and do all of the work as well. Don’t get me started on that one – that’s a whole weeks worth of blogs in the form of rants!
I think that is everything. Well a snapshot at any rate. I’ll try and go back and elaborate on the more interesting points another time.
So it’s still a nut house being run by a bunch of monkeys with the odd cake and celebratory LOTR day thrown in for good measure. On that level nothing changes and probably never will.
Right had better crack on. Wish you were here an all that.
