Today I am trying to escape from the office early. I don’t really NEED to be out before 4pm but I’d like to be and ideally want to make my exit by 3.30pm. I’m taking a leaf out of CJ’s book and doing a 7 hour day, except I managed to make it in for a reasonable start to the working day and she didn’t. I have been asking for suggestions as to how to make my escape and so far have had the following ideas from people:
Doctor’s appointment
Just leave and on Monday tell them you forgot you had your watch on Greek time
Teleportation? On Monday you can say you were abducted by aliens
Your brother has had an accident at work and you are his next of kin
Cardboard cutout, with a dictaphone on the chair talking about work stuff
Try the old 'neighbor called saying your door is open' although you know no one is home
Say you have a gas leak at home and need to dash back to let the gas man in
Just go!
I’m favoring the cardboard cut out idea as it would involve me not having to speak to my boss at all and just exiting the building. Although I’m not sure about the dictaphone talking about work as that wouldn’t be believable and if it was still in my chair at 5pm he’d get suspicious. Don’t want to tempt fate with the gas leak, open door or my brother having an accident and he won’t fall for the doctor’s appointment on a Friday afternoon. That just leaves the teleportation/abduction, my watch being on Greek time and just leaving anyway.
Another one has just come in; I’m impressed at the sheer detail of the plan if nothing else:
Leave your desk looking like you are still there, usual half cup of coffee, jacket on chair, bag (transfer contents to Tesco bag first) still under desk. Leave the phone off the hook resting on notebook with words like "secret file" and "special mission" written in scribbled writing. Don't tuck chair in.
I think perhaps this has been used before many a time. It’s good but I’d like to take my bag and coat with me when I go and we have a clear desk policy so I’d only get into trouble on Monday from Moon Monkey.
I’ll let you know what happens but I think it will end with me simply getting up and leaving at 3.30pm. The likelihood of Harley actually noticing (he is also to my benefit but not his, half blind at the moment – that’s why he was in A&E on Sunday – and sporting a lovely pair of 1980’s glasses) is slim to none and the likelihood of him remembering come Monday is even less. No one else in the office gives a stuff and will probably applaud me on my way out anyway. CJ could be the only one who questions it and if she does then…..well there will be sticks involved.
As an aside I was talking to Kirstie yesterday about Saffa and her flowers and it seems I may have misunderstood Kirstie’s theory. She thinks that NONE of the flowers are coming from her wife and all from another admirer. When questioned as to why she thinks this Kirstie said it was a number of things including the fact Saffa gets so coy and quiet about them when they arrive, whereas if they were from the old ball and chain she’d be more blasé than that. I’m not so sure so some more Clueless sleuthing may have to occur.
Have a good weekend peeps.
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